Economy

The United States Senate has 100 members. A bill gets passed in the Senate when a majority of Senators vote for it.

Before the vote, however, there is a debate held over the merits of the legislation. The vote comes AFTER the Senators vote to end the debate and vote on the bill. It only takes 51 Senators to pass a bill, but it takes 60 Senators to end the debate.

After the Republicans lost their majority in the 2006 elections, there were 49 Republicans remaining in the Senate. Of course, if 51 Democrats vote for a bill, even if all 49 Republicans vote no - that bill will pass. They didn't like that idea. Instead, they came up with another idea - instead of voting no, they just decided to vote against voting. Often. More often than ever before.

Then there was another election in 2008. Republicans knew they were going to lose some seats, but thought they could hold on to at least 41. They warned voters against electing 60 Democrats - and the dark possibility that there would be No Stopping Them! if the GOP lost the ability to prevent the Senate from voting on new bills.

Dark, DARK DAYS! D.C. shrouded in darkness! Oh yeah, I just realized, Obama's skin is slightly darker than most voters. LOL, coincidence!

Republicans lost 8 more seats, leaving them with only 41 of 100 - the bare minimum needed to continue keeping bills from being voted on.

At least, they DID have 41 - until Arlen Specter switched parties to become the 60th vote the Democrats needed to end those debates and vote on the bills.

They lost their ability to filibuster. This is, of course, GREAT NEWS FOR REPUBLICANS! - according to Fox News.

Oh, it's the mainstream media. It crapped its collective pants again.

Today's stupid-o-rama:

Fox News: Recession May End This Year

Reuters (c/o Yahoo!): Bernanke fears recession could extend to 2010

Well that sounds both good and serious at the same time. Now first off, I'd like to point out that Bernanke is a tool. Now that we've got that out of the way, let's take a peek at these articles.

Ok, so the quote from Bernie-boy that both of these news sources used to create their headlines appears to be:

"...there is a reasonable prospect that the current recession will end in 2009 and that 2010 will be a year of recovery."

So wait, Fox News actually conveyed this headline.. conservatively? You mean Reuters is the fire and brimstone maker? Well, I guess everyone makes mistakes.

This year is already on its third month. I know times are tough, but this year will be over before you know it. I feel like Reuters was taking advantage of the fact that some people still have 2008 lingering in the backs of their minds. "2010! That's nearly two years!"

Can't we just report the news? Where did you guys get the word "fears" anyway, Reuters? Did you just pull it out of your hat? Or was it your "doom-n-gloom phrase o-matic?" The word "fear" only appears in the headline. It's not even in the fucking contents of the article! Moreover, it's not even a quote! He never said fears!!

In fact, if you ask me, I think we're fortunate if the recession is on the rebound in 2010. What the fuck?

Fuck it. Buy your own damn fries.

Soros Sees No Bottom for World Financial "Collapse":

Renowned investor George Soros said on Friday the world financial system has effectively disintegrated, adding that there is yet no prospect of a near-term resolution to the crisis.

Soros said the turbulence is actually more severe than during the Great Depression, comparing the current situation to the demise of the Soviet Union.

...

His comments echoed those made earlier at the same conference by Paul Volcker, a former Federal Reserve chairman who is now a top adviser to President Barack Obama.

"I don't remember any time, maybe even in the Great Depression, when things went down quite so fast, quite so uniformly around the world," Volcker said.

OH SNAP:

I’ve been ruminating over economic prospects for next year, and I’m getting scared.

The economy is falling fast. We’ll see what tomorrow’s employment report says, but we could well be losing jobs at a rate of 450,000 or 500,000 a month.

Time to invest in the fedora hat market.

Not so much: