Iraq

Iraq ranks 5th on the 2008 Failed States Index. The Surge Is Working! Why won't you crazy people just admit it already?

Truth through repetition! Facts are stupid!

Say it with me: (repeat each mantra 10 times before advancing for maximum effect)

• The Surge Is Working!
• The United States does not torture.
• A wiretap requires a court order.
• The long-term fundamentals of our economy are strong.
• The British government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa.
• We've never been stay the course.

Friedman just claimed on MSNBC that the Iraq war was always about democratizing the Middle East.

Hmmm, thats strange. I could've sworn that there was some other, completely different reason that we went to war in Iraq.... What was it again?

Oh yeah, I remember. Saddam was going to give nuclear weapons to Osama Bin Laden and everyone was going to die:

A subtle distinction, perhaps.

But... but.... we can't leave until we "win"! McCain said so!

Why does Iraq want us to lose?
Reuters:

Iraqi officials have said they would like to see all U.S. combat troops out by October 2010.

An agreement that included that date would require the Bush administration effectively to accept a timeline almost identical to the one proposed by Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama, who opposed the 2003 invasion.

The Onion wins again:

Citing the Bush Administration's ongoing refusal to provide a timetable for withdrawal, the U.S. troops stationed in Iraq have devised their own exit strategy.

In a striking rebuke of the assertions of the Pentagon and the White House that a swift exit is neither practical nor possible, soldiers of varying rank have outlined a straightforward plan of immediate disengagement, dubbed "Operation Screw This."

Study concludes:

President George W. Bush and seven of his administration's top officials, including Vice President Dick Cheney, National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, made at least 935 false statements in the two years following September 11, 2001, about the national security threat posed by Saddam Hussein's Iraq. Nearly five years after the U.S. invasion of Iraq, an exhaustive examination of the record shows that the statements were part of an orchestrated campaign that effectively galvanized public opinion and, in the process, led the nation to war under decidedly false pretenses.

On at least 532 separate occasions (in speeches, briefings, interviews, testimony, and the like), Bush and these three key officials, along with Secretary of State Colin Powell, Deputy Defense Secretary Paul Wolfowitz, and White House press secretaries Ari Fleischer and Scott McClellan, stated unequivocally that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction (or was trying to produce or obtain them), links to Al Qaeda, or both. This concerted effort was the underpinning of the Bush administration's case for war.

THANK YOU, BILL. Hey? Hey, Bill? I miss you. You're pretty cool.

NPR does a fact check on Bush. Next time Bush does a speech, they should give NPR an advance copy. That way, the networks could show NPR's translation as subtitles during Bush's speech.

6 Iraqi ministers who were loyal to Shi'ite cleric Moktada al-Sadr quit their posts today.

When I first read this, I was a tad bit confused. This al-Sadr guy isn't in the government. Why does his opinion have sway over 6 Iraqi cabinet members? Well...apparently, his dad was the famous Iraqi cleric Mohammad Mohammad Sadeq al-Sadr, and other Shi'ites in Iraq are loyal to him, and will do what they say. And, so I guess, guys in the Iraqi cabinet belong in this group.
So, they're people that are in the Iraqi Government to represent, not only al-Sadr, but Shi'ites as well.

Okay. So, now we have Iraqi officials quitting their posts because al-Sadr wanted them to. So, that just leaves the question, why did al-Sadr want them to?

Hmmm...'Tis a crazy thought. Americans. Out of Iraq.

Here is everything you need to know about the civil war in Iraq and the plan to escalate the war:

• We can't leave "until the job is done". "The job" will be done when we find weapons of mass destruction get rid of Saddam bring democracy to the Middle East prevent civil war secure the region help establish a pro-U.S. government Bush's term ends.
• Give the President's plan (escalation or "SURGE!!!") time to work before you say its a bad idea and shouldn't happen.
• If we leave now, we'll have to come back later to "finish the job". (Don't think about what "the job" is supposed to mean.)
• If we leave now, we'll be attacked in the US. Or, we must fight "them" in Iraq or we'll have to fight them on the streets of our own cities in the US. Them meaning bad guys in general (the turrists.)
• The President is the Commander In Chief, and this means he is the commander of everyone, all the time. Congress has no war powers aside from cutting off funds.
• Democrats should cut off funding or shut up.
• Cutting off funds doesn't mean mandating the safe return of all troops, it means all soldiers will be left in the field without armor or ammo or transportation where they will all die horrible deaths at the hands of terrorists.
• Only someone who hates the troops and America would cut off funds.
• 17,500 troops is too a surge. Thats like, almost one more soldier for every 1,500 Iraqis.
• Opposing the president's escalation of the war provides comfort to the enemy (turrists.)
• When is a diet pill worth $153? When it REALLY works.

Ok, so maybe that last part was just a pushy ripoff advertisement. Its hard to tell the difference sometimes.