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The Onion: War-Torn Middle East Seeks Solace In Religion

JERUSALEM—As an uneasy truce between Israel and Hezbollah continues, millions of average men and women in the Holy Land are turning to the one simple comfort that has always seen them through the darkest days of their troubled history: the steadfast guidance of their religious faith.

Thank Allah for the Onion!

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Happy Birthday, Earth!

Yesterday was the Earth's 6,010 birthday!! ... Right. I still can't understand those that believe this stuff. I mean, come on! Look around you. When you look up at the stars, what do you see? The "heavens?" When I look at the stars, I see an incomprehensibly complex and large system above us. I see infinity. I see that we are tiny. We're nothing. Which is what makes us so special. I mean, sure statistically, there are problably other forms of intelligent life out there, but if you really do think about it... Hitting exactly the right conditions for life is an improbability. We may be the only intelligent life out there. Of course, this is grossly egotistical to think that not only are we the farthest along in our evolution, but that we're the only intelligent life in the universe.

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